Know How I Know You're Gay?

You think Dido is the GREATEST. Especially her hair-do... it's so kicky! And you're such a fan, you actually know her full name... not just the "Dido" part. And you know how to spell it, too! It's "Dido Florian Cloud de Bounevialle Armstrong", thank you very much. Her mother was a poet, you know, that's why it's such a poetic name. And she really does seem regal, too, don't you think? Just like the Carthaginian queen she was named after. Well, her first name, anyway. Although you've always thought the "Cloud" part of her name was very appropriate, too, since she's so wispy and vapour-ish, just like a cloud. Isn't she just the greatest? You wish she and you were best girlfriends, and you know that you would be, if she would only answer the five or six emails you send her each day. And no, it's not like stalking or anything, just because you waited outside her hotel for three days when she was in town last month. And you've got to go now, so you can update your fan website All Dido .